A academic year begins for both my two children and for me. This is my second year and final year of my Fashion and Clothing course after which I will hopefully enter the land of employed in whatever capacity I can find within the textiles community. What to do though and how to juggle it all without being swallowed up by that ghastly maternal guilt that I am not there enough for my children?
The new timetable has caused more stress than I thought was actually possible. Why? Because the guilt that comes with shuttling the children here there and everywhere became by the end of last week all consuming. If you were voicing these worries to me, my reply would be that it is good for your children to see their mother follow her passions and see that the world isn’t completely ruled by their after school activities and homework timetables. That they will become independent individuals just as I did with a working mother. However, giving this advice to yourself is really rather difficult. Hence tears and chocolate consumption and a knotted up body that wouldn’t chill even in a yoga practice.
However, a weekend away with my husband to celebrate our anniversary helped enormously including seeing the last night of Jeeves and Wooster at the Duke of York theatre, a look in art and fabric shops (andrew was thrilled at this bit) plus a wander down Kings Road. Walking really does clear the mind and calm the thoughts (especially if interspersed with glasses of bubbly in London).
So as I venture into college today to receive yet another revised timetable and face the headache of trying to fit everything in and keeping everyone happy I am doing it with a clearer head (and a hangover).